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Birdnesting After Divorce: Could it Work for Your Family?

If you are divorcing with children, you may be concerned about child custody. Who gets the kids? Where will they live? How will the divorce affect them? 

The old way of shuttling the kids back and forth between parents has been replaced with an innovative type of child custody: birdnesting. Birdnesting allows children to stay in the family home. Instead of them going back and forth between houses, the parents come to them and take turns caring for them. When the parent is not at the marital home, they live elsewhere.

Birdnesting is still relatively new, so many studies haven’t been done to determine its effectiveness. Still, there are some pros and cons that you should be aware of to see if this setup would work for your family.

Pros of Birdnesting

Here are some benefits of birdnesting:

  • Stability. One of the biggest concerns in child custody is a lack of stability. Children are dropped off and picked up from parents’ homes at various times. They may be forced to move or change schools. That is not the case with birdnesting. Children stay in the marital home, attend the same schools, and still see their friends.
  • It can be easier to co-parent. Having children stay in the same household allows for more accessible communication. Plus, parenting can be easier when there’s no excuse that they’re staying at one parent’s house. There’s no more reason for forgetting clothes or other items to bring to another parent’s house. The children stay put.
  • There’s less pressure. Not sure if you want to buy a house? Birdnesting gives you time to think about your future. Maybe you want to move. Perhaps you need time to save up. This makes birdnesting a good temporary arrangement.

Cons of Birdnesting

Birdnesting is not all fun and games. Here are some downsides you should know about:

  • It can be expensive. Unless you and your ex-spouse are sharing a small home or apartment when you’re not in the marital home, birdnesting can get costly if there are three residences. This is not a setup you can keep up for too long.
  • It can be confusing. The kids may be confused about what’s going on. Are Mom and Dad still married? Are they just taking a break? Things can be even more confusing if the parents are dating and bringing partners to the marital home. 
  • There can be disputes. Since you and the other parent will be in and out of the marital home, who cleans it? Who replaces food and other items? There needs to be communication on this issue.

Contact Us Today

Child custody can be a contentious issue. Many parents opt for birdnesting, which can be beneficial as a temporary arrangement. However, it takes a lot of work on the parents’ ends.What is in your child’s best interests? The Law Office of David J. Rodriguez, PLLC, has 30 years of experience working with mothers and fathers. We can advise you on seeking fair access and custody of your child. Schedule a consultation today by calling (210) 716-0726 or filling out the online form.